September 9, 2020

What if?

What if I dared?

What if I dared to dream a dream so big that it began to frighten me?

What if the dream I want to pursue pushes my back against the wall and the only way out is to lean into it?

The only way to find fulfillment and joy is by opening the doors of my guarded self and allowing myself to be vulnerable.

Vulnerable to love.

A love that is the first love I was supposed to have but denied it any air.

Instead, searching for it in relationships to say the right words and show it in the right way.

What if the love I have longed for… ached for, was in my grasp?

What if that love I have been searching for is buried inside?

Pushing against the gates to be let free.

Because it knows how much I am in need of it.

How I am finally ready to embrace it.

What if I dared to dream?

Dared to dream a dream so audacious and bold that it frightens me?

What if my wildest, craziest dream is to love myself so unapologetically that it allows me to step into myself as the person I have waited to be all my life?

What if I am whole and present and alive? 

And stand up that way for myself and for all the people in my life, fully?

What if I dared?

-Tumkeen, Writer

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