Not old me, not new me.
Not child me, nor adult me.
Not me I want to be, or the real me.
No, not even “just” me.
You are an embodiment of all of you.
The past, present, and future all united and bound under the skin of me.
Everything that has ever happened has made you into who you are today.
And yet, despite what has happened or didn’t happen, you are exactly who you were going to be.
I am so much more than the circumstances surrounding me.
I am so much more than this moment and this place.
I am a progeny and I am an ancestor.
I am a living and breathing entity that occupies a space in a time where it seems like no other could be in it but me.
I am exactly who and where I was designed to be.
There are no chances, no mistakes, no coincidences, or irony.
I was written into this play at this precise moment in time, and for a role no one can do better than me.
I am whole.
Not broken, not shattered.
I am a living creation with my own set of emotions, stories, ideas, and experiences.
I am a whole package.
Who I have been running from is who I have been searching for.
Where I came from is exactly where I am headed.
I am a cycle of leaving and returning back. Each experience teaching me to return more evolved, more humbled, more wise.
So here I am, me.
The same me who wanted a friend to play with, an extra bit of affection, and a place to shine is the same woman who gets excited about messages and friend requests. Loves the unexpected hug and kiss from loved ones. Is me trying to pursue a passion that has been burning inside for much too long.
Me, I haven’t gone anywhere.
But it seems as though I lingered a while in that space between leave and return for a bit longer than I should’ve. I got lost.
But here I am loyally waiting in anticipation like no one else can.
Waiting for me to bring wisdom, humility, and knowledge tucked away in a travel bag eager to be given as gifts.
The wait has been long.
So long that I worried I would be left stranded forever.
But here I am.
Tired but content. Pleased.
“You’ve been gone for a long time.
What did you bring back with you?”